Slanted View

APA Heritage Month
by Nathaniel Jue

I notice that May is quickly upon us, and of course you know what that means? It's Asian Pacific American Heritage Month! What? Says who? Is there such a thing? Yes, just as February is commonly known as Black History Month, the month of May is nationally recognized as Asian Pacific American (APA) Heritage Month. But does America really recognize this? What does May's designation even signify? I stopped to reflect on the meaning and importance of APA Heritage Month. So I put on my rice paddy hat and karate robe and ate some sushi. Popped in a Kill Bill DVD and ogled at my Lucy Liu poster. Wait... that's not what this month is about!

Indeed, APA Heritage Month isn't about these fluky, banana flavored, distorted pseudo-Asian fallacies. In fact, many such items in American society feign Asianness. There are certain aspects of our everyday lives that we assume are part of the Far Eastern fabric of American culture. After all, this country was founded on the adoption of other customs from other countries. But when you are out and about this month you might want to take off your yellow-tinted glasses.

For instance, when you eat at a Chinese restaurant, you are usually served fortune cookies at the end of the meal. Their origination in the U.S. has been debated for decades; however, these after-dinner treats are not a bona fide Chinese delight. Alas, it wasn't a custom from China to offer cookies with profound little tidbits of "Confucius say: you have good yin and yang". What kind of absurdity is it to believe that they give out ridiculous and ambiguous Oriental wisdom to customers in China? Everyone knows that giving away free food impacts the restaurateur's profit margin! Fortune cookies may indeed be some offshoot of ancient China, but the gimmick was introduced in America, so it is not something we should celebrate as Asian. So in fact, this Chinese dessert is safely as American as apple pie (in bed).

Speaking of Asian cuisine, Mongolian beef is not from Mongolia. Chinese chicken salad? Not from China. (Chinese chicken feet salad – maybe). Hawaiian pizza? No comment. Kamikaze shot? I don't think Japanese would invent a drink about suicidal pilots. And Panda Express sure ain't from a panda. On the other hand, the California roll definitely is from California; i.e. not authentic Japanese sushi. And yes, soy sauce is great, but on your rice? Gross. That is preposterously the most un-Asian dinner etiquette ever. More so than playing with your chopsticks.

Another Asian imposter is the television show, Kung Fu, with David Carridine. Please don't pop in that DVD this month. If it ain't Bruce, it ain't kung fu. Yes, I know Chuck Norris can cure cancer with his tears, but let me repeat: Bruce. No last name. Just Bruce. And while I'm on the topic of kung faux, don't start playing that song, Kung Fu Fighting this month. Definitely not the APA fight song.

Among the most bogus of Asian American misnomers is the inane vehicular group activity called the Chinese fire drill. I don't even know where to begin. But do you really think Chinese firefighters stop their fire truck in the middle of the street, exit all of their doors at once, run around like idiots to the other side and then hop back in and drive off again? What the hell is that? No, seriously – what the hell is that!

And let's not start on the Chinese water torture notion. Definitely. Not. Chinese. If they're going to torture you with water, they might as well stick your head in a toilet for eight minutes. If they want to slowly drop something on your forehead, why not a fist? If the Chinese are going to torture you, they'll probably just feed you cow tongue.

Thankfully, APA Heritage Month is not about any of those things. It is, however, about honoring and appreciating the true APA impact in the United States. Asians are responsible for many innovations, inspirations and ideas in this country – the yellowy things we take for granted. APAs aren't just bottled up in their Nihonmachis, K-towns or Little Saigons. Their influence can be found in much of our modern American culture. Among them include the generally known Chinese invention of fireworks, which are the centerpieces of many of America's national holiday celebrations. I mean after we battle through hundreds of cars, navigate through thousands of people to find "the spot" and huddle behind the collage of heads in our view, what else are we going to stare up at in the sky? The cramps in our necks and deafness are gifts from our Asian ancestors.

As we learned in history class, we are also grateful to Asians for Amtrak, because if it weren't for the Chinese immigrant railroad workers of the Industrial Revolution, we'd be wasting money on gas for our cars. Thanks to the laborious track work of some of the very first APAs in the United States, we do have the option of traveling twice as long on land to get from here to there.

Of course the recent influx of imported Japanese vehicles has changed the automobile world quite a bit in America. Seriously, have you driven a Ford lately? I mean we all know the number one stolen automobile in the U.S. is the Honda Civic. Hooray! That popularity has got to mean something. True, all of middle-America drives Chevys. But as gas prices rise, drivers want higher fuel efficient vehicles, and there will be even more Hondas and Toyotas on the highways. To the Hybrid mobile!

And the electronics we use in daily routines are all great Asian products. Without our Wii's and Nintendo DS's, we'd have a very dull time. I mean, we couldn't bowl or play tennis in our own apartments. We'd actually have to do those sorts of things out of our own living rooms! No way!

And lastly, one of the more wonderful APA contributions to American culture is the concept of legalized state gambling. Yes, the lottery. State lotteries are in fact derivatives of the casino game Keno, a numbers-guessing game of sorts, with roots dating back to the 1800s. Chinese workers passed time by playing. Identifying which handful of numbers out of several dozen will be chosen is impossible at best. But the low risk/high reward factor is attractive to many Americans, and especially Asian grandmothers who need a fix between their mah-jongg and bingo tournaments. We all know Asians love to gamble. And without APA gambling addiction, America wouldn't have state lotteries, Keno, Pai Gow poker and, of course, blackjack dealers!

Whether it's obvious or not, the feng shui of APA influence in the U.S. is all around us. And it goes deeper than the various martial arts classes, the cars we drive, the appliances we use and the cuisines we order in from. APAs have been a part of American history for almost two centuries. They have overcome great amounts of scrutiny, racism and even political restrictions on the number of immigrants from Asian countries. The Chinese received prejudice during the Gold Rush; Japanese were concentrated during World War II; and Koreans and Vietnamese were assailed after America's conflicts with their respective countries. Through it all, Asians still wanted to come to America, sacrificing much of their lives in attaining better lives, knowing that in the end, it was worth whatever risk it took to make it in the land of opportunity.

While the journey to and in America has had its ups and downs, APAs continue to make impacts in our society and culture, both subtle and obvious. So this month is time for us to acknowledge those influences and be grateful for their contributions to the America we live in today. So go out there and celebrate. Sake bombs all around!

Nathaniel Jue has been writing ever since he won first place in his fourth grade essay contest. However, he has been ranting for the past 28 years.